In OPIG one must learn, and one must learn FAST! However, sometimes stupidity in OPIG knows no limits (*cough* James *cough* Anne *cough*), so for the newer (and prospective) members of the group, I thought it wise to share the some ground rules, a.k.a. The Ten Commandments of OPIG.

Vaguely adhering to these will drastically improve your time in OPIG (see Exhibit A), and let’s face it, none of them are particularly challenging.

1. No touchy the supervisor.
2. No touchy other students.
3. You’re not late unless you’re after Charlotte. Don’t be late.
4. All prizes are subject to approval by The Party.
5. Thou shalt not tomate.
6. Any and all unattended food is fair game.
7. Meetings (especially the one before yours) will go on as long as they have to.
8. Finish your DPhil or die.
9. This is not a democracy.
10. NO TOUCHY THE SUPERVISOR!

Bonus (and final rule). If this is your first time at Group Meeting, you have to present (well at least introduce yourself).

P.s. we’re not that bad, I promise!

Disclaimer: while I’ve categorised this post as “humour”, I take no responsibility for your enjoyment.